Organized Tours make dead people die

I am down the street from the majestic Taj Mahal with about 4 minutes of internet time left, and I wanted to give a quick update. Today's subject - organized tours.

We are a group of 9 Aussies, 2 Kiwi's and an English moron. Allow me to elaborate:

My father: Smart, educated, often hungry. His company is enjoyed by all.

Elizabeth: My father's partner in crime - grew up here, more interesting than everyone else I don't know combined. When she was 4.

Sharon: Elizabeth's daughter, my roommate. She's a pharmecist, so I plan on being sick constantly.

Me: Model

David (I think): Father traveling with his son. From Wellington, NZ. Wants his son to get a "proper" job and likes telling all of us that. Meanwhile, I'm taking 3 months off. Needs to work on his audience.

Tim: David's son. Nice guy, taught English for 15 months in China prior to this trip. I think he's into Asians.

Ruth: Think of a train crashing into a helicoptor, add Hollywood special effects explosions and death and some form of sexually transmitted disease. Apply to personality. Season with an ability to constantly talk about oneself.

Glen and Wendy: Married Aussie couple from an 800 person town. Actually they're too nice to make fun of here, so I'll have to make something up: they may be trannies playing each others role.

Abu: Our guide. From the warrior caste. His mustache is absolutely amazing.

I will make fun of the concept of being on an organized tour of a country where, out of the four of us traveling together, one has lived here for 17 years, two have traveled it before, and one is a veritable expert who shows up all of our guides with their lack of knowledge. Other than that, it's going very well, seeing some wonderful sites like the Taj Mahal, Agra Fort, and the inside of a train (google them, especially the train. You'll be pleasantly surprised that it's very similar to the inside of a train).